My friend who is well acquainted with grief called last week and asked me a question that I’ve been thinking about ever since: “How are you handling your grief … are you welcoming it when it shows up?”

It’s an interesting twist and a perspective I hadn’t considered. I might want to befriend my grief, given that it’s here to stay. But since hospitality is my thing and welcoming people is what I love doing, it didn’t take me long to realize that “welcoming” grief is not where I am. Pre-COVID, when someone showed up at my door, I’d be thrilled to see them and would normally say, “I’m so happy you’re here!” In considering “welcoming grief,” I can’t imagine ever getting so comfortable with my grief that I could say that in earnest. I’m no stranger to grief, which can occur with loss of any kind, and I’ve lost many significant people in my life.